Any other loners here? diary post

UnPRePared

For the last time, I am NOT Frank Grimes!
I like people - I have to be very social in my field, at least on the road - but they do exhaust me. Mal called me an "extroverted introvert", and it fits.

Solitude and time to yourself really isn't a bad thing. I find it to be quite helpful, almost restorative, even inspiring if I'm writing or doing something creative. However, I do think there can be too much of it; I can get stuck in my own head. This wee brain in here just never shuts off, and when you're introverted it can cause *sigh* brooooooding, man, really motherfuck yourself.

So, I'm just very picky with the people I have in my life. I had lots of fairweather friends and acquaintances in my 20's - they're long gone. It's a very small circle now, and a good amount of it, admittedly, is family (not all of them, blood doesn't give you a free pass). The litmus test is this: can I be around you without feeling drained? Might sound fucked up, but it's a real feeling I have. So many people take, and may not realize it, despite how well they mean.

It's why I'm with Małgorzata. I can be around her for days at a time, but we can also state to each other that either of us just need some space without offense. it just works. My Dad once said "as you get older, your needs change. People run about and live their own lives, their own way. That's because, hopefully, they're starting to figure it out. If you're lucky, maybe you'll figure out before you're gone."

I know this forum shouldn't get this reflective or serious, but there's a bloke or two out there that would share your mindset. Until then, as long as you're not miserable, and you enjoy the solitude, appreciate it while you have it. Live how you wish, regardless if it's not "normal". It really can disappear in an instant.
 

analeggsalad

the Gentleman's sissy hypno
but i just cant find a friend group that i can tell i jerk off to my cousins dirty panties without them looking at me like im a freak, say nigger faggot or kike around them without them thinking wtf, drink in the morning without judgement, etc.....

maybe im going insane but i cant find a guy friend or group of dudes to chill with that have the same interests and arent sucking societal expectacions cock.

honestly, people have to cover their asses even off work. Every dude you know, smart or stupid, senses intuitively that they will be gravely punished for talking honestly about those things. When you catch yourself

We are living Jewish Bolshevism. It's the same in character as it was in 1917. It controls our minds and conduct even behind the closed doors of our own homes. We've all heard of Havel's greengrocer

}I think it can safely be assumed that the overwhelming majority of shopkeepers never think about the slogans they put in their windows, nor do they use them to express their real opinions. That poster was delivered to our greengrocer from the enterprise headquarters along with the onions and carrots. He put them all into the window simply because it has been done that way for years, because everyone does it, and because that is the way it has to be. If he were to refuse, there could be trouble. He could be reproached for not having the proper decoration in his window; someone might even accuse him of disloyalty. He does it because these things must be done if one is to get along in life. It is one of the thousands of details that guarantee him a relatively tranquil life "in harmony with society," as they say.

{6}Obviously the greengrocer . . . does not put the slogan in his window from any personal desire to acquaint the public with the ideal it expresses. This, of course, does not mean that his action has no motive or significance at all, or that the slogan communicates nothing to anyone. The slogan is really a sign, and as such it contains a subliminal but very definite message. Verbally, it might be expressed this way: "I, the greengrocer XY, live here and I know what I must do. I behave in the manner expected of me. I can be depended upon and am beyond reproach. I am obedient and therefore I have the right to be left in peace." This message, of course, has an addressee: it is directed above, to the greengrocer's superior, and at the same time it is a shield that protects the greengrocer from potential informers. The slogan's real meaning, therefore, is rooted firmly in the greengrocer's existence. It reflects his vital interests. But what are those vital interests?
The slogans are solidarity with BLM, or self censorship to cover your own ass when the topic comes up. The signs are the BLM signs, the twitter and instagram reposts demonstrating your solidarity.


one day something in our greengrocer snaps, and he stops putting up the slogans merely to ingratiate himself. He stops voting in elections he knows are a farce. He begins to say what he really thinks at political meetings. And even finds the strength in himself to express solidarity with those of his conscience commands him to support. In this revolt the greengrocer steps out of living within the lie. He rejects the ritual and breaks the rules of the game. He discovers once more his suppressed identity and dignity…His revolt is an attempt to live within the truth

That's why we're here, brotherman. That's what this is. They want to conquor twitter, reddit, and even small online videogame communities because these were places outside of the scope of their surveillance, of their ability to moderate, shame, and direct them. They legitimately fear places like this and are resorting to terrorism accusations in order to get the control they need.

Whatever, play the game IRL to cover your own ass. Cause you can't fix it and you gain nothing by revolting against it, you lose a lot actually. Just don't let the mask melt into your face, cause then they've conquered not just your public social life (which is not enough for Jews), but your mind and soul (for which they will settle for nothing less)


should edit in to be fair: In previous, more Christian less Jewish generations the bigger fear with the most potential for blowback would be talking about wearing your cousin's panties like the Bane mask. Yeah it was annoying and oppressive, and people like us would still be shitting on them, but it's nowhere near the league of destruction committed by those engineering our social norms today, whose aims are aggressive, motivated by that group's desire for vengeance, and are actively destructive to you as a normal white guy
 
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G

guest

Guest
This is really gay. But I can relate.

At the end of and after High School I had a group of friends that honestly felt like family and for a time we would have all done anything for each other, genuinely. Then the hard drugs started to come along and most couldn't handle their shit. I haven't seen/talked to any of them in years but I know they've been in and out of rehabs, fucking their own families over, and all that. Once you hit a certain point with that shit your life has to become either about getting fucked up, or not getting fucked up. Like Junior Sopranos said, "When a dog you love gets rabies...."

I've had a wife for almost a decade, who has really become my best friend (and only) more than a lover which is it's own issue. We know its probably best to end things before we buy a house or pop out a kid so we can just get a clean break, but we go back and forth. I'm a little worried about the complete isolation that could come with it, not to mention feeling like a real Tomlinson. Already on the edge with all the faggotry and covid shit surrounding the world too it could drive me nuts. I've tried going out to bars and stuff just to talk to a girl to feel human and I will tell you all these fucking millennials might as well have plastic brains. They are all the same factory made manikins, your missing nothing.
 

analeggsalad

the Gentleman's sissy hypno
I've tried going out to bars and stuff just to talk to a girl to feel human and I will tell you all these fucking millennials might as well have plastic brains. They are all the same factory made manikins, your missing nothing.
you'll start to love us once you get a good dose of Zoomers (the first White Minority generation- but the white ones are faggots too)
 

UnPRePared

For the last time, I am NOT Frank Grimes!
This is really gay. But I can relate.

At the end of and after High School I had a group of friends that honestly felt like family and for a time we would have all done anything for each other, genuinely. Then the hard drugs started to come along and most couldn't handle their shit. I haven't seen/talked to any of them in years but I know they've been in and out of rehabs, fucking their own families over, and all that. Once you hit a certain point with that shit your life has to become either about getting fucked up, or not getting fucked up. Like Junior Sopranos said, "When a dog you love gets rabies...."

I've had a wife for almost a decade, who has really become my best friend (and only) more than a lover which is it's own issue. We know its probably best to end things before we buy a house or pop out a kid so we can just get a clean break, but we go back and forth. I'm a little worried about the complete isolation that could come with it, not to mention feeling like a real Tomlinson. Already on the edge with all the faggotry and covid shit surrounding the world too it could drive me nuts. I've tried going out to bars and stuff just to talk to a girl to feel human and I will tell you all these fucking millennials might as well have plastic brains. They are all the same factory made manikins, your missing nothing.

I'm not sure if you want any advice regarding the wife, as a man of (luckily amicable) divorce myself.

You can ignore this and call me everyone's favorite slur for it, but if she is your best friend, I can tell you something: it's the best thing a partner can be, and no, it's not common. My ex was a lovely woman, but I don't feel like we ever were true friends. We bypassed that entirely, and somehow it worked. We connected on a level despite the differences, whereas with Gosia, we connected on a level BECAUSE of our similarities and differences. And no surprise, she's my best friend.

Take that as you may. You won't be a Tomlinson no matter what you decide.
 

O-BLOCK NIGGA!

Ask me about my cock size
Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People" is still the standard on what to do out there with people, at any age.

I just had to break it off with my good friend of about 10 years. He told me back in November that he wanted space but that we were still cool, then I straight up didn't hear from him until I saw him at my friends bday in May. He and his girl tried to throw some half-hearted apology my way, in a loud room full of people. Then later on that night he dipped, while saying "let's talk soon". From May to August I didn't hear anything, so I had to tell him to fuck off. Then he 180'd and said he was always trying to break away, and that I'm the problem, etc etc. He wasn't expecting me to confront him in the way that I did, so it threw him for a loop and he stammered like fucking Ralph Kramden, getting defensive right off the bat.

I pieced together later on that his girl was mostly to blame for us coming apart. Which is ironic...she has a habit of taking out her shit on him, while expecting him to do all of the cleaning and house maintenance. For years: I DEFENDED him from her, or at the very least I tried to get him to fucking defend himself from her. She's a black hole that flipped him into becoming a malignant tumor.

I know that all sounded very fucking queer. It is, to some degree.

Point is: You can't truly have anything if you don't have a reputation and a support base to help you. No one is that narcissistic to think that they got somewhere all on their own. You don't need much; billionaires don't have a ton of real supporters in their support base, they keep it real tight themselves. But they have SOMETHING. And if you're gonna get anywhere, no matter what; you'll need that too.
 
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Jim-sucks-shit

*ALL FUTURE COURT DATES ARE VACATED*
I'm a complete loner who shoots down just about every attempt of interaction that comes my way. I cut off just about everyone I knew in life, beside my family (even that's getting to the point...) about 8 years ago when I moved across the country without telling anyone.

It's a problem that'll only get worse but it's whatever at this point. I'll most likely get gunned down because of something shitty in my past and my association with a group of some riff raff back home.

Growing up I was a latchkey kid with not much adult supervision. That ran from 3rd grade until I finished highschool. It made me too self reliant and too used to my own company that it feels like I've been the same way my whole life with being a loner.

For some odd reason I think about killing myself regularly. but ever since my stupid brother had kids, and they call me tio, I can't do it. So I have to wait until they're both married, at least.
If you ever do off yourself can you kill Sam Roberts beforehand and film it? Thanks you're the best.
 

analeggsalad

the Gentleman's sissy hypno
Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People" is still the standard on what to do out there with people, at any age.

I just had to break it off with my good friend of about 10 years. He told me back in November that he wanted space but that we were still cool, then I straight up didn't hear from him until I saw him at my friends bday in May. He and his girl tried to throw some half-hearted apology my way, in a loud room full of people. Then later on that night he dipped, while saying "let's talk soon". From May to August I didn't hear anything, so I had to tell him to fuck off. Then he 180'd and said he was always trying to break away, and that I'm the problem, etc etc. He wasn't expecting me to confront him in the way that I did, so it threw him for a loop and he stammered like fucking Ralph Kramden, getting defensive right off the bat.

I pieced together later on that his girl was mostly to blame for us coming apart. Which is ironic...she has a habit of taking out her shit on him, while expecting him to do all of the cleaning and house maintenance. For years: I DEFENDED him from her, or at the very least I tried to get him to fucking defend himself from her. She's a black hole that flipped him into becoming a malignant tumor.

I know that all sounded very fucking queer. It is, to some degree.

Point is: You can't truly have anything if you don't have a reputation and a support base to help you. No one is that narcissistic to think that they got somewhere all on their own. You don't need much; billionaires don't have a ton of real supporters in their support base, they keep it real tight themselves. But they have SOMETHING. And if you're gonna get anywhere, no matter what; you'll need that too.
what you really want is him to be your husband instead of hers

Go for him 7th. Maybe it's what you both really want. You only have one life. Just do it
 

analeggsalad

the Gentleman's sissy hypno
Thats why i acknowledged how queer it was
Maybe you should acknowledge the unspeakable spiritual, emotional, and (hesitantly at first, but eruptively passionate once you break the glacier you've both been furtively swimming under for years) physical union you have cultivated among yourselves

Imagine not having to wait for his call or txt back. He's right there in bed next to you, every day, every morning. Clearly you're more of a go-getter in this relationship, but he needs you just as much. Be there for him 7th. Complete each other. When true love is staring you (and you his groin) in the face, why bother denying it. Do it brothaman
 
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